


I Forgot to Say We're Engaged

by thevalesofanduin



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Community: hobbit_kink, M/M, Pining, Thranduil is a romantic, fake engagement, or up to something
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-08
Updated: 2014-08-08
Packaged: 2018-02-12 08:18:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2102274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thevalesofanduin/pseuds/thevalesofanduin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His magical ring is gone and if that isn't bad enough he - and the rest of the company - are stuck in the elf king's dungeons.</p><p>Bollocks.</p><p>Then he's taken from his cell for questioning, friendly informed that if he doesn't tell the king why they are there they will starve. Well, that is quite rude, for doesn't the elf king know Bilbo is to be married to Dwalin and he would like to get on his way to get exactly that done, thank you very much!</p><p>Double bollocks.</p><p>Written for <a href="http://hobbit-kink.livejournal.com/11476.html?thread=23753428#t23753428">this prompt</a> at the Hobbit Kink Meme.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Forgot to Say We're Engaged

Well, things had just gone to pot completely, hadn’t they?

Bilbo slumped against the cold wall of his cell and glanced out through the bars. Moonlight streamed in from above but it was a bit chilly so he figured they were quite deep down in the dungeons. It worried him, for it made escaping – _if_ they managed to get through the bars of the cell anyways – almost impossible.

If only he had his ring.

But he’d _lost_ the damned thing! He’d searched for it, of course. But then there were the spiders and after that the elves. He’d fought them, the elves, when they took him captive and he’d felt a strange, dark sort of sadness and longing when they locked him in his cell, his own hands searching his empty pockets for something that was already lost. He’d smacked himself then, calling himself silly and a fool. It was a _ring_. Granted, a magic one, but just a trinket nonetheless! So what was he, a dwarf? To feel so possessive of a mere ring.

He should be glad it was lost, no matter how much it might have helped them.

 

Suddenly a pair of elves stopped walking, right in front of his cell.

While the elves walking around to keep an eye on them didn't interest him anymore - and weren't the elves of Rivendell much more pleasant? - this did catch his attention.

He gave them a sideways glance and when they unlocked his cell he tried very hard not to panic.

They had already taken Thorin out of his for an audience with king Thranduil and he had been less than pleased when he'd been deposited back into his cell.

Now, it seemed, it was Bilbo's turn.

But his turn for what?

He knew Thranduil had tried to cut a deal with Thorin for he'd overheard the conversation between Balin and the king in exile. But he was just a hobbit, in no place to make a deal with an elf king about anything regarding their company.

Worry in his mind, he was led from his cell without any words from the elves.

He passed the cells of a few dwarves, most coming forward to the bars and sending him looks ranging between sad and worried.

"Dun't tell 'm anything." Dwalin muttered as he walked by.

Bilbo turned his head - stumbling in the process and feeling like a proper fool - and gave the other a firm nod. Above anything, he wanted to make Dwalin proud.

\---

He was lead through long hallways, all but running as the elves set a quick pace with their long legs.

Eventually they entered a big room, with elegant arches carved from wood, overlooking a garden and a big, oak table in the middle of the room with chairs of the same wood and beautiful carvings on the arm- and backrests.

At the head of the table sat an elf. He was tall and imposing, expression schooled in a mask of indifference and cool eyes watching him as he stepped near. On his head rested a crown made of twigs and his robes were a dark red, edges trimmed with gold. Bilbo was quite sure this aloof yet impressive elf was king Thranduil himself.

He stood awkwardly for a moment, debating ignoring the king – _he_ had locked them up, after all – or keeping good manners.

In the end, he was still a hobbit.

“King Thranduil.” He mumbled and bowed his head for a moment.

When he raised his head again, Thranduil was looking at him with an amused expression. He waved his hand at the table and extra chair set at it on the opposite side of the king. “Please, have a seat, master…”

“Baggins.” Bilbo replied automatically. When he made his way over to the table he scolded himself. He should have given another name.

He had a bit of difficulty getting on the chair, as it was quite high. But to his great relief it was extra high so he could actually sit at the table. A table filled with food.

Well, king Thranduil definitely knew how to get in a hobbit’s good graces.

But a garden view and food wasn’t going to make Bilbo tell him anything. 

“Master Baggins.” Thranduil leant his head to the side, looking quite haughty. “Have some food. You must be hungry.”

 _Starving!_ Bilbo thought and he was happy his stomach didn’t loudly agree. But instead, he looked at Thranduil and gave him a tight-lipped smile. “No thank you, I’m good.”

Thranduil raised an eyebrow. “Truly?” He chuckled. “If I may give some advice, master Baggins, I would suggest you eat. It could be a while until your next meal.”

Bilbo’s eyes widened. “You’re going to starve us?” He blurted.

Thranduil shrugged. “If no-one tells me what you are doing here, perhaps. A king has to do something to protect his people.”

Bilbo huffed. “We aren’t here to bring any harm to you and your people, my lord.” He shook his head, even in his frustration and anger still managing to stay polite.

Thranduil reached for a glass of wine on the table and took a sip, studying Bilbo. When he put the glass down, his eyes were still on the hobbit as he wondered out loud: “Then why are you here?”

He was in a dangerous spot now.

There were two guards at his back and a king hanging to his lip. If he didn’t tell them why the company was in Mirkwood, they would starve. The look in the king’s eyes made that very clear to him.

Thranduil was deadly serious.

He swallowed and lowered his eyes.

He couldn’t tell Thranduil. Not only had he promised Dwalin, he simply couldn’t betray the company like that. But _something_ had to be done!

That’s when he thought of it. He could do what he had to do best. Tell a story.

But what about? What for could a hobbit possibly be traveling with a group of dwarves with? There was none whatsoever! Unless…

“I am engaged to Dwalin, son of Fundin.” Bilbo blurted, realizing he hadn’t really thought that through too much. And Dwalin! Oh he hoped the strong warrior would never hear. However untrue the story was, Bilbo didn’t want to hear the warrior laugh at the blatant lie! Didn’t want to hear him say it was a ridiculous idea. Especially not because ever since the incident with the Stone Giants, he had been falling for the other – saving someone’s life was the sort of impact that could cause such feelings, after all.

Setting aside his worry about Dwalin – the other wasn’t here to laugh or break his heart – he felt worried for a whole new reason. What if he’d blurted it out too quickly? What if it sounded too unbelievable?

Yet when he saw Thranduil’s raised eyebrow and the upward quirk of his lips, he knew he had his attention. Knew he had a chance.

So he began.

He told the king of how they had "met" - he scared me half to death, knocking on my door and asking if he could fix up the hinges on my fence and door and such other things. I nearly slammed the door right back into his face!

He continued telling the king how they had become "friends" even though he was quite certain that in reality, Dwalin overlooked him more than half the time - he worked in and around my house for a few days, so of course I offered him lunch a few times. He was quite grateful and you must understand my shock when he was also quite kind! Even after he was done fixing up my house he visited often as he worked for others and we shared many drinks, pipes and stories.

He then spoke of how ridiculous they had been, fools in love both not wanting to admit their feelings even though in truth it was only him that was shying away from telling Dwalin his feelings as the dwarf surely didn't share the sentiment - looking back on it we were so obvious, but one doesn't really see that about himself, now does he?

How Dwalin had been the one to awkwardly ask his uncle if he would approve of him courting his nephew, even though the mere idea Dwalin would want to court him was an illusion - it was so sweet, that big dwarf afraid of rejection of his offer from my uncle who is a least a head shorter than him! But my uncle loves him, as he is a Took and they are more adventurous so there was no need for worry.

How their courtship progressed and if there was a wistful tone to his voice as he spoke he hoped the king didn't notice – it was all very romantic and, believe it or not, flowers were involved! But it was a short courtship. You see, dwarves only love once in their lives so when Dwalin told me I was the one, well, it was a sealed deal.

He explained why they had set out on the road – mind you, this is very sensitive information so don’t tell any of the dwarves I told you! But, the only way we can get married properly is to do it in front of his family. To hobbits there is nothing proper about it, the traveling I mean, but they will recognize the marriage no matter where it was held. We might need to throw them a party, though… But Dwalin, he’s dwarven nobility. So the only way his family will recognize the marriage is if it’s done in front of them. And since none other than just a few family members and friends would come to the Shire, we are going to the Iron Hills.”

When Bilbo spoke, Thranduil listened quietly. Now, though, he folded his hands together on the table and inquired: “Yet you were found wandering my lands. Why?” The demanding tone was gone and the king’s expression had opened up a bit at Bilbo’s explanation. Now, he merely sounded confused.

Bilbo felt ecstatic at the fact Thranduil seemed to buy his story. He felt like he only needed to make this next bit sound believable and he’d have them out in no time at all.

Looking the elven king straight in the eyes, he pointed out: “It is hardly our fault we got lost in your forest. Did you know roads disappear out of nowhere? A shock to us, and quite unsafe! We knew, of course, that it would be safer to go around the forest but ‘tis a shorter road and you must understand that after weeks on the road I am quite keen to call Dwalin my husband.”

“Very understandable.” Thranduil nodded. “And had we known this was your reason for traveling we would have been kinder. But I am king and I must protect my people, especially since before you no-one mentioned any marriage.”

“Don’t I know.” Bilbo said, feigning a sigh. “The secrecy of dwarves isn’t known without reason. This, especially is a sore subject for Dwalin as he has found not everyone as accepting of our courting as his kin have been. Especially Men and those living close by them are quite…” He trailed off, unsure how to continue.

Thranduil’s lips quirked up a bit, almost like he was amused. “Narrow minded.”

“Yes, unfortunately.” Bilbo nodded in agreement. “So it is good to see one such as yourself so accepting.”

Inclining his head, Thranduil said: “Love is not something one should put boundaries on.”

“Indeed.” Bilbo exclaimed, for wasn’t that the truth? “So, if you don’t mind me asking, your highness, when can we set out to Lake town? I am sure you will understand that I wish to reach the Iron Hills as quickly as possible and winter is upon us, no less!” Bilbo asked boldly, heart beating wildly in his chest as he prayed he’d lied enough to convince the elf of their reasons.

Thranduil laughed, something which shocked Bilbo. “I find you amusing and honest, master Baggins. There might be bad blood between elves and dwarves, but I would not let that harm your way to happiness.”

\---

And thus, the dwarves were released from their cells.

Dwalin was first and Bilbo could see the confusion on his face. He had to act quickly if he wanted to keep this act up!

So before Dwalin could say anything, Bilbo leapt forward. He took one of Dwalin’s hands in his and with what he hoped was a winning smile, cried: “Oh darling, it’s good to see you again!” He stood a bit closer, ignoring Dwalin’s frown – oh how he wished it were a different expression! – and pecked his cheek. He ignored the blush on his own cheeks, the butterflies in his stomach, his rapidly beating heart. It was an act. “Did I not tell you the elves would be reasonable if only we told them the truth? The king is in support of our marriage and wants us escorted all the way to Lake town!”

“What?” Dwalin demanded with a dark frown.

Bilbo had never been so glad at Dwalin’s lack of eloquence so he at least couldn’t ruin Bilbo’s plan – and break his heart in the process. He squeezed the other’s hand – he could be excused for never wanting to let go, right? – and grinned. “I know, unbelievable, right? Let’s quickly get the others out. We need to depart straight away if we want to be married before winter.”

Dwalin obviously was shocked out of his words and very confused by the situation. But he played along – be it by not yanking his hand out of Bilbo’s and not shouting obscenities at the hobbit for his invasion of Dwalin’s private space – and that was important.

Bilbo tried hard not to think too much about the pink hue on the other’s cheeks and the unreadable expression in his eyes.

\---

Everyone was released and they quickly departed – although the dwarves were all in various states of confusion and ready to voice it upon being let out of their cell if it hadn’t been for Bilbo’s stinky eye glaring them down.

There was one elf appointed to lead them from the forest – they needed it if they didn’t want to get lost again.

When they left the dungeons and one of the elves wished Bilbo a happy wedding murmurs in Khudzul broke out amongst the company. When Bilbo thanked the elf and said he was sure that Dwalin and him would be very happy indeed, Dwalin froze and the murmurs intensified.

Bilbo sighed.

At least they were whispering in Khudzul.

When they departed and their guide seemed not to be paying attention for a moment, Bilbo gratefully took advantage of the opportunity.

He’d gotten them this far and they better not ruin it!

He looked over his shoulders and glared at the dwarves until each of them had shut up – probably understanding that questioning their predicament would piss off Bilbo which was _not_ good. 

The only one that spoke was Kili, demanding to know “Whose marriage?” only to be hit in the head by his uncle.

After that, they walked silently and Bilbo could feel the unease as well as thirteen pairs of eyes on him.

He ignored them and instead stroke up conversation with their guide.

 

When they excited the woods and arrived at the edge of a lake, there was a human with a barge waiting for them.

The elf excused himself and left the dwarves for a moment to speak briefly with the bargeman, pointing at the group of dwarves and a hobbit as he did so.

Dwarves who were all looking at Bilbo, some with curious glances and others with a bit more distrusting ones.

Thorin, as leader, was the one that demanded: “What is going on?”

Bilbo huffed. Grateful as ever. “I got us out.”

“How?” Thorin questioned and the others mumbled their agreement.

Everyone but Dwalin, who was still silently watching Bilbo with that same unreadable expression on his face. _That_ was the most unnerving thing for Bilbo because he didn’t know what Dwalin was thinking. He could only pray it wasn’t something along the lines of _let’s kill the hobbit when this is over._

Bilbo rolled his eyes with a sigh. “By talking to them.”

“And telling them what?” Thorin frowned.

Bilbo glanced to the elf and the man and could see that they were starting to make their way over to the group. “Now is hardly appropriate.” He mumbled, just before their group was joined by their – now two – guides.

“I shall leave you now.” The elf told them. “Bard shall take you to Lake town and bring you to an inn where you can stay.”

The man stepped forward, bowing his head in greeting just the tiniest bit. “Well met and congratulations.” He greeted. “You can get on now, we shall be leaving shortly.”

The dwarves, after eyeing the boat warily for a second, got on. Yet Bilbo lingered to thank the man – Bard. “Thank you for your help and consideration.”

Bard chuckled, seeming to understand what Bilbo was hinting at. “You are very welcome, master hobbit.”

Then, the elf turned to Bilbo and inclined his head. “It was a pleasure to meet you, master Baggins, and I wish you all the best.”

“The same to you.” Bilbo replied with a smile.

When the elf turned and was about to walk away, Bard asked: “Will I see you here tomorrow, Legolas?”

The elf looked at Bard over his shoulder and nodded with a smile. “Aye.” He promised and then disappeared between the trees.

When Bilbo looked at Bard and saw the tending expression in his eyes when he looked at the trees, he understood.

“Ah, I see.” He mumbled, feeling envious.

Bard smirked.

\---

Bard indeed brought them to an inn, where they managed to get three rooms for them all.

After Bard had said his goodbyes to them, however, the dwarves didn’t rush upstairs to put their packs down only to rush back down again for some much deserved ale. Instead, as Bilbo made his way upstairs and decided the first room on the right was to be the one he’d sleep in, _all_ dwarves joined him.

Of course they did.

The moment the door was closed, Thorin – hadn’t the other liked him for saving his life? What a way of showing it! – stepped up to Bilbo, demanding to know what happened in a hushed voice that was both curious and impatient. “Do you have a silver tongue, master Baggins, that you are able to get us out of the elf king’s dungeons with just a few words?”

The others loudly agreed with Thorin.

All except for Dwalin. He stood at the door, giving Bilbo an uncertain look that made Bilbo feel like he should crawl underneath a rock and never emerge.

He’d gotten them out of the dungeons, at the cost of his heart most likely.

“Perhaps I am a story teller.” Bilbo shrugged, for wasn’t that the truth? He’d spun a story. A beautiful one. If only it were true.

“But what did you tell him? I mean… a marriage?” Kili asked, finally having lost his patience. 

Next to him, Fili’s eyes darted over to Dwalin, mumbling: “To Dwalin no less.”

Bilbo sighed. Time to tell the truth – although of course, not everything. “He threatened to starve us if I didn’t tell him what was going on. So I thought of something that would explain me traveling with you lot which is quite hard, mind you! Hobbits don’t just leave the Shire for a nice travel. So the only thing I could think of was a marriage between me and one of you. Thranduil is a romantic soul, I suppose, for the believed it all.”

For a moment everyone looked at Bilbo. Then, though, he was clasped on the back. He was thanked and told he’d done a good job.

When Kili cried: “But why Dwalin?” Bilbo wasn’t surprised.

He’d been shocked when no-one had asked before clapping him on the back – especially Dwalin.

For a moment, though, he panicked. For while he’d expected the question he had no idea how to respond! Not with the truth, that was for sure.

_Dun't tell 'm anything._

“Because he couldn’t keep his mouth shut.” He told them, shaking his head. Normally, he would have given Dwalin a disapproving look, hands on his hips. But he didn’t dare to even glance into the warrior’s direction, let alone look at him while speaking. Instead, he looked at Kili, who’d asked the question. “Telling me to not tell the elves anything. Who else was I supposed to pick to make it sound believable?”

They swallowed the lie like Thranduil had all others.

All except one.

\---

The entire company was sitting in the inn, having drinks and celebrating their escape from Mirkwood.

Bilbo was with them, but he only took small sips of his ale as he tried not to let his lies weigh on him.

He’d done the right thing.

 

“Master Baggins, a word.”

Bilbo didn’t need to look at the owner of the heavy hand on his shoulder to know it was Dwalin.

“Of course.” He said with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He pushed himself up with hands that weren’t completely steady and when he followed Dwalin up to one of their rooms, he felt so nervous he was almost nauseous.

He knew what this was about. But he didn’t know what Dwalin would say. Or rather, he knew – you are a fool, Burglar, to spread such ridiculous lies – he just hoped it wasn’t so. And his heart, his treacherous heart, told him that Dwalin hadn’t punched him yet, so at least that was a positive thing and could mean the dwarf liked him! His mind, however, told him that the warrior would probably prefer to yell at him in private before knocking him out.

When they were inside a room and Bilbo closed the door, he turned to find Dwalin standing in the middle of said room, hands crossed in front of his chest.

“So we are to be married.” He said, something unreadable in his voice.

Bilbo swallowed and lowered his eyes. Now, even his heart wasn’t positive about the situation anymore. “That is what Thranduil believes, yes.”

“And what story did you fabricate for him? Did you lie about how we met, what I was doing in the Shire?” Dwalin demanded.

“Of course I did! I would never tell him the truth.” Bilbo burst and his body shook. Was this all that was important to Dwalin? He was both relieved and disappointed! “I told him you were some sort of smith and about how we became friends and started courting. How we are traveling with friends and family to get married at the Iron Hills.” The words tumbled out before he could help himself, the hope settled in his heart before he realized. Dwalin hadn’t started yelling yet…

For a moment, Dwalin silently watched Bilbo fidget. Then, his voice softer than Bilbo had ever heard, he asked: “Why me? And not the bullshit reason you gave the others but the truth.”

Bilbo froze. There was not a single reason he could think of that made sense. Nothing but the truth anyway.

He averted his eyes and wrapped his arms around his chest.

He couldn’t lie. Not to Dwalin now that they were face to face..

“Because I want it to be true.” He whispered and if it weren’t for Dwalin’s gasp he’d have thought the other wouldn’t have heard.

“You want it to be true.” Dwalin repeated, stunned.

Bilbo nodded, not trusting his voice.

At least now Dwalin would pity him too much to yell at him, right?

With two big steps, Dwalin walked up to Bilbo.

Bilbo’s breath halted, his heart felt like it had stopped and he bit his lip while still staring at the floor. This couldn’t be good.

Then, Dwalin cupped Bilbo’s right cheek in the palm of his hand and gently urged the other to raise his head.

Bilbo’s eyes widened and he could only follow the motion, the smallest of flushes settling on his cheeks.

When their eyes caught, Dwalin’s were soft and curious. “Why me?”

“I don’t know.” Bilbo admitted, flush spreading across his face like wildfire. He’d thought about his feelings before and he still found it odd, so he couldn’t offer Dwalin another explanation. “I just do.”

“If I had known…” Dwalin mumbled affectionately. “I thought I’d scare you off, wanted to wait until we’d reclaimed Erebor. But if I had known you could love me, I would have done this sooner.”

Dwalin didn’t give Bilbo time to either think or react. He leaned down without hesitation, claiming Bilbo’s lips with his own in a greedy kiss.

Bilbo’s breathing stopped, but only for a second. When he caught on and realized Dwalin was kissing him he clung to the warrior and desperately returned the kiss.

Dwalin hugged Bilbo close, resting his hands just above the swell of the hobbit’s arse.

When their kiss broke he rested his forehead against Bilbo’s with the gentlest of smiles on his lips that Bilbo had ever seen.

Bilbo could only grin like an idiot. A happy one.

“Just one thing.” Dwalin said. “When we get married, it will be at Erebor, not the Iron Hills.”

**Author's Note:**

> I had a great deal of fun writing this and I hope everyone likes it! <3


End file.
